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July 23, 2012

the pits

This post is about something awkward and uncomfortable. No, I'm not referring to the three hour Bachelorette finale... I'm talking about chafing. 

post-cake massacre and a 1/3 of what I drank
After spending most of my weekend in a car traveling to/from Iowa for a wedding, taking advantage of the open bar and late night snacks, and then purchasing obligatory road trip food (read: Twizzlers, Baked Lays and Sweet n' Hot Beef Jerky), not to mention Taco Johns and at least a half gallon of Diet Pepsi in attempt to make myself feel less like the walking dead, I returned home at 4pm yesterday to the reality that I hadn't long run this week. It was also like 90 degrees and humid. I also had dinner plans at 6. 

There were two options: I could either skip it and keep my Potato Ole calorie surplus OR I could complete a rare night run.

Enter the 9:00 p.m. run. I got dressed, filled my water bottle and tried to psych myself up for what was sure to be a very sweaty run. 

My shirt came off around mile 2. (Thank goodness it was dark.) The miles ticked by (15, to be exact) and I returned home literally the sweatiest I have ever been. My shoes were squishy and I had to wring out my socks and shorts before hanging them to dry in my shower. 

Since I had chickens to put away, I hustled over to my aunt and uncle's after changing into dry clothes. I decided to hop in the pool to cool off and was immediately alerted to all sorts of hot spots, namely, my armpits. Yes, armpits. Technically speaking, it's not my actual armpit but rather where your arms and body meet when you put your arms at your sides. So really I've chafed above and below my armpit. I think it's from taking my shirt off, exposing my fleshy arms to the steady friction of arm pumping.  I did not think to BodyGlide my armpits. Lesson learned.

I thought about taking a picture of these battle wounds but that's just awkward. Even typing the word armpit has been awkward but saying underarms is far too lady-like. 

The only comfortable position is keeping my arms above my head which isn't really conducive to doing anything except watching The Bachelorette finale on Hulu.

In conclusion: Isn't it incredible how just a few days of poor food choices can make you feel just absolutely gross? Not to mention it takes the next few days, if not more, to begin to feel like your healthy self? Maybe it's just me. Either way, I need some detox tips.

2 comments:

  1. I feel like I spend a disproportionate amount of my life detoxing. BUT, this is the price we pay for living and loving. Or in my case, drinking a lot of beer.

    Green tea. Yoga. Oatmeal. Lettuce. LOTS of veggies. Accept that the first two days will involve extremist bloating and that once you're over that hump, it will be like none of it ever happened.

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    1. I've been drinking water like it's my job and then sweating it out on runs. Seems to be helping. Lugging boxes to and fro also seems to be effective. Thanks for the advice!

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